I guess my life lately has taken me on a combination of the last three. Busy + not knowing what to say + being in a running funk has me left with a big blank spot in my blog for the past two weeks.
I didn't want to write about how I was frustrated with running, or how I felt like it was sucking up all my time. I didn't want to write about my encounter with a crazy guy on a bike on one of my runs. I didn't want to write about how I hate the cold, I hate the dark, and I hate the treadmill. Even though my asthma is about ten times worse in the summer, I love that the daylight lasts so much longer and I look forward to my mid distance week day runs instead of dreading them. I didn't want to write about how I was so consumed my social events, weddings, bachelorette parties, trips to Manhattan that I almost completely skipped my long run last weekend.
But it wasn't long before I realized I was in a funk, and the only way out was to tell Jack about it. Not because I wanted someone to rant to - but because I knew it would make me own up to my slacking and figure out a way to make things worse. I was terrified that Jack would be mad, that I wasn't doing everything I was supposed to, but I wrote the email anyways. And of course my fears were irrational, and he told me not to worry missing a few workouts wouldn't kill me.
My major goal for this marathon is not a time goal. It is not to qualify for anything, it is not even to PR. I want to enjoy my training, and that means sometimes putting my friends or my work first, and putting running on the back burner for a day or two. Although I love to add up the numbers of my mileage and the times of my splits, I want to live that well balanced life in which my friends, my relationship, my work and my running. So I skipped a few workouts last week. But I went to Team Challenge Practice Saturday morning for a nice 8.5 miles, and then another 8.5 miles afterwards brining me to 17 miles total and I was feeling great the whole time. I was even feeling great afterwards as I spend the afternoon dancing around to some excellent old school boy bands while cleaning my apartment.
The Philadelphia Marathon is in exactly four weeks. In fact four weeks from now I will be recovering (hopefully well) on the couch with Boyfriend snuggled under a blanket or maybe even sleeping. I know how much I want to run this race, I know how much I want to run a GOOD race. Four weeks. It's going to take some planning and sometimes some sacrifice but I know I can make it all work out.