Feeding my inner fat kid

Towards the end of my freshman year in college I started to realize I had been abusing my amazingly fast metabolism, and it was taking revenge on my body by working a little bit slower than I would have liked. I had always been pretty slim, but I was starting to grow into my pear shaped body, something I was none too happy about. So I went on probably the first of many 'diets' of my college life. It was probably the best thing I could have done for myself because up until this point I lived on pretty much junk food. I stopped drinking soda, eating ice cream, chips, and french fries. Not only was this my first diet but it was one of the longest times I have ever been able to go without indulging.

That summer I worked at least three different jobs but in my off hours I spend most of my time hanging out with my older cousin K. K and I were like sisters. She was 18 months older and was everything a true older sister could be. She teased me about everything I did that was 'uncool', she taught me most of the things I knew about boys, and of course she convinced me that everything we did, no matter how stupid I thought it was, was a good idea. She was not often right, she had lots of bad ideas. My mom always said that when we were together we shared a brain.

K's parents often went away on vacation leaving her at home so that summer there were lots of parties. Lots of trips to the grocery store to stock up on french fries, ice cream, soda, chips, etc. Wait, aren't those all the things I was giving up? She didn't really care if I had given them up or not, she just wanted me to do things her way. I remember being at the store picking out all these things and her making a comment that 'everyone has a little fat kid in their stomach asking for all these things, and yours is really mad at you cause you don't feed it anything good'.

She was right. Not long before this we had been out driving and we came across a Cold Stone Creamery. I had never been to a cold stone, and if it had been about six months earlier I would have been ecstatic to get ice cream mixed with my customized mix ins on a freezing slab of granite. But I turned her down. I watched as she selected her flavor and various candies cookies and sauces and the kid behind the counter mixed it up into a delicious mess. As we walked out of the shop, I turned down he offer to even try the concoction and said something she still continues to tease me about to this day. "Sometimes I like to eat yogurt and pretend it is ice cream"

Well this weekend I definitely fed my inner fat kid. He is so happy I don't think he will be bothering me for months.

I don't remember when I started to hear rumors of this crippling snow storm that was threatening our city, but I heard it was going to start Friday during the day so I had to form a plan of attack. I don't mind food shopping but I really DO mind food shopping with a bunch of snow paranoid crazies! So Wednesday night after work I headed out to the Acme and got ready for a snowed in weekend. When I walked into the supermarket, like always I went for the usual basics. Apples, carrots, bananas, bagels, and 12 grain bread, but what happened next I am not sure. It was like something took over me, like I was possessed with a sugar crazed no care for her wallet woman. The girl who usually only buys things on sale was suddenly reaching for brand name cereal, soda, ice cream, and chips - talk about out of body experience.

I am convinced there is something about being cooped up in the house all weekend that makes normal people exponentially more hungry that ever possible. I planned to stay all weekend at boyfriend's apartment, mostly because we had spent the last snowstorm at my place. But also because my neighborhood turns into a disaster in the snow and I like to stay as far away from there as possible until it gets cleaned up.

Friday night after working all day, I started off by baking about three dozen chocolate chip cookies, extra chocolate chips. We ordered two pizza's as we waited for the snow to arrive. And we finished up the night with large bowls of Eddy's Thin Mint ice cream. WHAT?

Saturday as the snow blanketed us in a white winter wonderland we made egg and cheese sandwiches, with coffee, and a side of chocolate chip cookies. Yes that's right - chocolate chip cookies. There was various grazing throughout the day of a piece of cold pizza here and there, a few bowls of cereal and later in the day I broke out the white wine. Hey why not? It's not like I had anywhere to go. At least the whole day wasn't terrible, we sautéed pork chops in olive oil and whipped up some rice-a-roni with steamed broccoli. But of course one dinner was not enough for either of us so we warmed up the rest of yesterday's pizza and ate that as well. what is that you say boyfriend? we couldn't possibly get any more gluttonous? oh well i think we could - let's have ice cream and just for kicks lets dip chocolate chip cookies in it. SOLD!

Now it is Sunday, and after bacon eggs and toast for breakfast, the only thing I want to eat for three days is fruit and ice water.

On most days, that little fat kid who lives in my stomach can be awfully annoying. He wants chocolate and cake and fat and calories but I have pretty strong willpower and I tell him to shut it and behave himself. He learns to put up with eggs whites, water, vegetables and fruit. But there is something about a snowstorm that buries my control. It blurs my vision with beautiful flakes, maybe it's the fact that snow looks like sweet crystals of sugar.

I don't know about my inner fat kid, but I sure am looking forward to tomorrow's workout.

xx Sara